Because it cannot be bought, love is the rarest commodity in the world.
How can we get it, then? Where do we get the solutions to our problems?
In Albert Camus’ last university lecture, he put it beautifully:

"I believe...that it is awakened, revived, nourished by
millions of solitary individuals whose deeds and works every day
negate frontiers and the crudest implications of history. As a result,
there shines forth fleetingly the ever threatened truth that each and
every man, on the foundations of his own sufferings and joys,
builds for them all."
The solutions have to come from each of us, the very people
who need them. We all need love, so we all must give it.
This is the drive behind my efforts. I wish to spend my life serving
the people of our world, and to continually improve the way I serve it.

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Tuesday, January 6, 2009

All over the place with this one.

We Are All Connected I want to talk about something that I disagree with. I sometimes hear somebody talk about forcing themselves to do what is "right". They talk about self-discipline, constantly reminding themselves that they shouldn't do something. This can work, but usually it doesn't. In my opinion, it works when we have already (and remind our self often)learned that it is the "right" thing. What I mean is, if we don't know WHY something is right and that we need to be doing it, it will be increasingly difficult to tell ourselves to do that thing. It is the same way for making oneself not do something that is "wrong". If I don't have enough reasons (either learned by myself, another person, or the Holy Spirit) not to do something, I'll eventually do it.

For example, I start dating a girl, and my mom tells me not to go into her room, it's inappropriate. Okay, that's fine, right? I grew up having a general feeling that certain things are right and wrong without having to really know why. My mom is telling me that this certain thing is wrong and I trust her judgment, therefore, it must be wrong. Now, let's say my girlfriend had a much smaller house than I do. It's not small, but smaller, and designed differently. Their kitchen, dining room, and living room are all combined into one very large room. The rest of the rooms are bedrooms, bathrooms, a laundry room, and storage (my house has many rooms to be in). When her sister or brother is using the T.V. in the living room, we can sit at the dinner table or at the kitchen counter. Or...we can go into her room (she has a T.V. and a computer in there). Now, here's the other thing. Let's say my girlfriend and I are adamant on not doing anything sexual until we are married. Well, that sounds like a tall order, but we were going to do it (although, our reasons for that decisions were similarly non-existent; we just knew that we should wait). However, at this particular time(the beginning of the relationship), I did not associate not going into her room as being inappropriate for any particular reasons, let alone helping us to stay away from sexual activity.

I had disobeyed my mom on many occasions and gone into Sammy's room before, but I often felt convicted about it, and would go on periods of abstaining from doing so. At the same time, I began to notice that it was far, far easier to do things like make out and touch each other in her room. It was not until Sammy and I became addicted to sexual acts(although never sex) for me to realize why my mom told me not to go into her room. Needless to say, we failed at our goal of purity. It very soon became a rule that I not go in there under any circumstances.

Since then, that rule has been broken and reinstated dozens of times. We are over being addicted, and we have better balanced our relationship. However, each "time" causes me to yearn more and more for sex. After 25 months together today, we are DEFINITELY not having sex until our wedding night. I mean, if we KNOW we are going to get married, can't we just wait? And if we don't KNOW, which we don't we just think we probably will, then why risk it with someone other than our future spouse? So, we will abstain from sex until we are married, yet I feel an increasing want to do it now. This is sufficient to keep me out of her room (at least for most of the time). If only my mom had warned me with a WHY, instead of a simple command.

NOW, the it is about self-discipline. I have to remind myself of the real reason why my mom told me not to go into her room. I have to remind myself that it is important. I even have to remind myself WHY it is important.

Do you have any idea what I am saying? Because I am tired, and I hardly do.

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